Should negative actions by the First Lady affect the Pastor's job status or qualifications?

Should negative actions by the First Lady affect the Pastor's job status or qualifications? This is something that I have been wrestling with and I need some help with it. Allow me to give you further detail. If a pastor's wife is rude and is offending everyone who is anyone in the church. If she is not hospitable to guests and cannot lead anything without starting something negative and unproductive.

Is that pastor disqualified to do ministry? Should he be terminated? Should he resign?

I ask this in the context of a Baptist Congregational- ruled church, rather than an Episcopal or Elder-ruled church. But feel free to answer however you wish.

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Very well put Pastor Jones, I am teaching a series which takes us from Church to Kingdom, which instructs us to do our first work again...which is seeking first the kingdom of God...then converting to being as a child.

We are starting there and those things we find that the "church" has allowed, but not according to "Kingdom Principles" we are eliminating from our ministry. We are not comparing our ministry to what others do or have done, we are only setting in place what God is instructing me to do for my ministry. Now in doing so, some have left the ministry, however many more have been added. I learned from my father the Late Bishop in the Lord's Church before he went to be with the Lord, he said.."son Pastor your church and leave other pastors to pastor their church. I am not interested in traveling the world preaching, I'm not interested in being everyone's favorite preacher, I am interested in feeding my flock Kingdom Principles and whatever God add to my ministry be it, evangelist, favorite preacher, then so be it. I am a "Teacher and Pastor". I can operate in the 5 fold, but for now God has me perfecting the two.

You are correct...We all have sinned and come short of the Glory of God.

Marriage Helper/Pastor
The main issue here is forgiveness between husband and wife. Preachers and their wives sometimes forget they are human and make mistakes and do not apply this same standard. One fruit of the Spirit is "longsuffering" or patience with people as opposed to circumstances and trials. Most of us have short fuses and when they are ready to explode the perfect place to set them off is in front of the church assembly. When one can't get their way, they bring it before the church instead of keeping it at home. Before we get to "church", hurtful words like "ain't you supposed to be the preacher?" and "if you were a woman of God..." surface and do more harm than good. The devious, demonic show of force is to expose others in order to BRING THEM DOWN not to build up. We need to think things through before we make decisions that affect people, realizing that there are some things we cannot get back once we have said or done them.

If a preacher loves his wife, don't expose her bad habits in front of the church and vice versa. This is a tool of the Devil. If you disagree with your wife/husband do it at home and not in front of the church. This is ONE of the main reasons why women who prophesied were instructed not to do so when their husbands were present in I Corinthians 14. Marriage is a symbol of faith, love, and trust between Christ and His church, and not a relationship where there is constant wrangling and feuding.

It's amazing how we can forgive others but we can't forgive the person whom we said "for better or worse, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do us part." I wonder why the bible does not mention any of the wives of the apostles in the bible by name or their function in the church. We don't see any wife of any of these men anywhere or their influence upon their ministries. This is not a coincidence. God knows how to set things up to keep the Devil from disrupting His plans.

Also, spouses need to agree on how to discipline the children. If one says one thing and the other says another this could bring problems in the family that spill over into the church arena. This is especially true (not all the time though) in stepparenting situations where one is not the biological parent.
Minister Mallet, sounds like deeper issues had been allowed to go to far before intervention and discussions at home. This behavior is occurring thoughout our churches. Many men, including myself have to find out the hard way that we are not listening to our wives the way we should. I have found that a women is going to be heard one way or the other. It is up to us as men to actively listen to what our spouse is saying.

The foundation for good communication must be made at home. I can be wrong, but it sounds like more attention was given to being the "first lady" oppose to being the "pastor's wife", and more attention to being the "pastor" than being the "husband". God has a "Kingdom Order" that we have put out of order.

My wife simply wanted to be "my wife" and not the "first lady" which resolved so many issues in our marriage, however what she shares with me at home that will help the congregation, I speak it from the pulpit. She is now the friend, and helper to those in need and they call her..."Andrea". Wow, unheard of in the African American Church huh. But the love, harmony, peace, and anointing covers my home and ministry like never before.
I love this discussion and the insight provided. We must take the time to step away from what we think is pleasing God, because I believe the institution of marriage is so high on God's list of things that please Him that anything that puts it asunder is not of God. Ministry will NEVER separate a marriage if WE do it according to God's will and not our desires.

More pastors (males) must check our ego and our expectation of our wives as it relates to the church. Absolute power corrupts absolutely.

Excellent insight Rev. Luckett
This must be a touchy one, but no one has answered it, so I will repeat it. I want to see what people really think.

Since you bring up women in ministry (of which I am an advocate and encourager of. I am currently discipling my wife and another young lady currently).If this were a female and her husband was out of order and verbally abusive to the church body, should that female be held accountable for his actions? Would she be disqualified? Would the consequenses and course of action be exactly the same for her as a male? Would you suggest that she resign?

Sis. Yahweh, this has brought another dimension to our discussion thank you for sharing your thoughts. You encourage me to think these things through. It is better to consider this now than later.

Everyone, please feel free to shed some light on this.
How can a teacher of the gospel and go against the gospel?

the bible says women are not to teach or preach in the congregation over say they you see why God no longer uses the churches to proclaim the gospel...what you teach is opposite of what the bible teach...another word for opposite is anti-gospel as in anti-Christ...Christ is the teach opposite of Christ is to oppose Christ..oppose=anti Christ...
So Rev Jones is preacher calling you the anti-Christ?
this dude is ridiculous, he doesn't believe in romance and he doesn't believe that women can teach the Bible to other women or children. His poor poor wife, I really feel sorry for her and if he stopped for just a moment, he would realize that the discussion isn't even about that.
Preacher what you are advocating is a misinterpretation of scripture. In interpreting the scripture, one has to be cogent of historical, and cultural goings on at the time of the writing. What is interesting, is that the two verses before the verse you are citing deal with cultural issues. Paul in his writing always dealt with cultural issues, and eternal truths. He never mixed them because to mix them could cause confusion. 1. braiding of the hair (cultural) wearing of expensive clothes (cultural) teaching men (also cultural). If you research the history of the city in which Timothy was in when Paul wrote this you will see that all three are dealing with prostitutes of the area, and Paul did not want the sisters to be seen as emulating them. Also with the phrase "let them learn at home" Paul was advocating radical treatment of women, in the first century women were considered to be more property than person, and were not educated. An educated woman was the exception, and often times was reserved for the rich, and politically connected. If Paul had intended that women should not teach, why then would he have recommended one to the Romans in terms of their continuing their spiritual growth (Phoebe, who was a deconess, he mentions Junias, who he says worked hard among the apostles. There is a host of other woman he mentions in terms of their ministry. I believe if we knew our history, knew the culture of the day, we would be better equipped to preach. There is no anti-christian behavior here. There does appear to be a lacking of understanding
The culture was not much different than now....God's word is not based on one's culture...
You cannot be serious.... not much different than now. Have you studied the first century church at all. I am sorry my friend but you could not be more wrong. We do not have prostitutes on one side of a temple, and food offered to idols on the other, In terms of culture, my friend anyone who has taken any type of class on hermeneutics understands that one has to be cogent of the culture in the first century to be able to give an accurate picture of what is trying to be said by the writer.
We do not have prostitutes on one side of a temple, and food offered to idols on the other

Knowledge puffeth up. Those who professed to be knowing ones put on an air of superiority.



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