Should negative actions by the First Lady affect the Pastor's job status or qualifications?

Should negative actions by the First Lady affect the Pastor's job status or qualifications? This is something that I have been wrestling with and I need some help with it. Allow me to give you further detail. If a pastor's wife is rude and is offending everyone who is anyone in the church. If she is not hospitable to guests and cannot lead anything without starting something negative and unproductive.

Is that pastor disqualified to do ministry? Should he be terminated? Should he resign?

I ask this in the context of a Baptist Congregational- ruled church, rather than an Episcopal or Elder-ruled church. But feel free to answer however you wish.

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Divorce is certainly not an option, to say that it was would be to put the ministry above the marriage, that simply is not possible seeing what marriage it to represent, however based on the scenario, that image my be perverted from the onset, In either case no divorce is not the answer. The pastor, either stepping down, or requesting a leave in order to get his house in order would be apropos.
Pastor Jones, I've known of situations where, the actions of a First Lady provoked you to focus on the Pastor
himself, but to answer your question about this kind of behavior from a first lady, and whether it should effect
the Pastor's qualifications? He is not the perpetrator, and he is not accountable for another's actions (wife or not)..
I do believe he is accountable for order in the house (church and home) and her actions should be addressed...
A First Lady should demonstrate the fruits of the spirit, be an example for the younger women and reflect the love
of christ in her life!! If this is not happenning, she should be silent in the church and dealt with at home...
other than that, "then look to the hills from whence cometh your help" Jesus is always right! AND HE HAS THE
I am sorry to disagree with you Debra but as a husband and as a pastor, he (the pastor) is going to be held accountable to God for the actions of his family as well as give an account for the church he was entrusted with. He is going to have to stand before the Judgement Seat of Christ and have to account for his family and his pastorate. If the actions of his wife cause some to stumble, he is going to have to account for that. If she is a spectacle in public then he should deal with her in public. I know of a pastor whose wife disrespects him in front of the entire church. She has used her position to place the church in serious jeopardy financially. She has dissolved the board of trustees. So now this pastor has no accountability to anyone. Should this man deal with his wife "at home" as you put it?
So how do we deal with disrespect and disobedience in the church? Public or Private?

I think that it is a case by case. Not everything should be made public, but some things need to be dealt with publicly, especially public offenses.

Any opinions on this???
I would like to know where did we come up with the title "First Lady" it is not biblical.  Just because a woman marries the pastor of a particular church, it does not give her a title of privilege.  The pastor's wife is just a member of the church she holds no office or exalted position.  I wish someone could show me some scripture the specifically states that the wife of the pastor is to be acknowledged as the "First Lady".
The title "missionary" is not biblical either but it is still used. I think that it is a title moreso out of respect for the husband. Just as there is no constitutional title of "first lady" in the constitution the office is acknowledged out of respect for the husband recognizing the union of marriage.

Where did this title come from?  Was it ordained by God?  A missionary is not considered a title, it is simply a person going on a mission. When did God instruct us to honor the pastor by giving his wife a particular title?


In most COGIC circles it is considered a title. Considering what a pastor's wife goes through, and also realizing that the only reason he can do what he does is because of her support, she deserves to be honored, and that is for any woman who marries a pastor and actively supports him.
Seriously Rev considering that there are a lot of things that go on in the church that are not biblical, why start here. Seriously a pastor affiliating him or herself with a politician is not biblical. the celebration of a pastoral anniversary is not biblical, even giving the top seats in the church to the ministers is not biblical. Granted the title is not biblical but there are other more pressing issues that should be addressed way before this.
Maybe I am just a little too old-fashion and the contemporary church and organized religion is getting the better of me.  However, I do think it is an important issue nonetheless--the young man asked a question about a so-called "first lady" behaving badly but could it be that she does so because after all she is called the "first-lady" causing her think that she is above the rest.

Being "old fashioned" is irrelevant to the conversation, the point is often not because of a title, but often its just because she feels she is above all because of whose wife she is. I had to confront a pastor once because of his wife's behavior. She said some untoward things to my fiance at the time, and it needed to be corrected and that correction had to come from her husband.

Perhaps if we worried less about the title and more about the person and considered that a person is not a reflection of a title nor is a title reflective of a person. You are and ever will be Spencer before you are Rev Miller. The issue is when people cannot separate themselves from their so called titles.

I thought this was done, but gentlemen you bring a different light to the question at hand. Does the title have anything to do with abuse of authority? Regardless of what you may call the pastor's wife in a church (Realize there are few titles in the church that are actually used in the Bible the way we use them today. Every denomination has taken their spin on things. This has been done because many of us have to balance authority in different polities. The concept is biblical, although the use of the different titles is debatable) In this case, let's take away any titles for the remainder of our discussion. Does that change anything? Let me know what you think and why?


Just F.Y.I.


None of the gospel proclaimers in the Bible ever refered to themselves as Reverend, only God is referred to by that title (in the OT).But then again due to differences in polity, I understand the use of it.


Pastor and Bishop have the same contextual connotation in the Bible, so they pretty much mean the same thing. Refer to the book of Timothy. This is why many denominations don't use the term bishop unless it has been redefined. It is redundant, but then again due to differences in polity, I understand the use of it.


Apostle has been used in so many different ways in contemporary christianity. I would be shocked to see it used correctly. But then again due to differences in polity, I understand the use of it.


and the list goes on.....


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