Help For Sexual Addictions

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Help For Sexual Addictions

Website: http://askthechaplain.blogspot.com/
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Latest Activity: Jan 2, 2012

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Comment by Erica Joseph Shepherd on April 7, 2011 at 8:41pm

Today People with demons have  learned to live with their bondage. They keep trying harder to live better and think if they pay enough or pray enough the pain, misery and torment will go away. When it doesn’t eventually they conclude, "That's just the way life is," and accept their condition.  

It is at this point that they need the Holy Spirit to come in and expose the hidden works of darkness operating against them and for Jesus and the finished work of the cross to spiritually bring light to the demon infested or demonically  influenced part of their soul and body. That's the ministry of Integrated Healing Prayer Ministry. I'm a minister of Deliverance , Exorcism, Healing and Inner-healing, who doesn't appease the sin sick demonic condition. In the name of Jesus I Cast Out the Works of Darkness, Jesus then delivers and heals the Spirit, Soul, and Body clothing them in “In Gods Armor of Light!”

Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on February 1, 2011 at 9:57pm
Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on October 13, 2010 at 3:49pm
My Personal Demons (edit title)
New Title

I was exposed to pornography when I was about 12 years old growing up in Connecticut. My brother had a trunk in the attic filled with hardcore porn and I found it. I would secretly go to the attic after school and look at it, I never told anyone or shared my discovery with friends. Porno has haunted me most of my life, I accepted Christ at the age of 14, and thanks to the power of the Holy Spirit I began to feel convicted about my activities. The sad truth is even after becoming a Christian I realized the images had already done their damage. After joining the Air Force at 18 my first roommate was a porn junkie, and I fell back into temptation again. Eventually I was able to request a new roommate but the damage was done. To this day I have to make a daily concerted effort to pray and seek God for strength. I put blocks on my computers and I make sure I don’t go in stores that sell porno like 7-11 and other corner stores. I can’t let my guard down EVER because I know that is an area of weakness for me; but not just me but millions of other men, yes Christian men too!

I hope this short testimony will help you realize how the enemy carefully calculates your destruction through the avenue of sexual sin. I share some funny stories and personal things so you will know you are not alone in this struggle. Jude 24 is my favorite scripture when it comes to God keeping us in this evil world, meditate on it and make it your mantra. The Lord can keep you from falling, sometime even when you DON’T want to be kept! If don’t believe me keep reading!
Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on September 30, 2010 at 8:59pm
Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on September 25, 2010 at 6:47pm
Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on May 24, 2010 at 10:25pm
Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on November 22, 2009 at 10:03am



Lust: Webster's Dictionary defines lust as "intense or unbridled sexual desire," "an intense longing: craving" and a "conscious impulse toward something that promises enjoyment or satisfaction in its attainment." The problem with lust is that it is based in selfishness and works contrary to love. In fact, it is the opposite of love (see lust vs. love). When fed, it can grow into an uncontrollable force in a person's life. Like a wildfire, lust can consume a person's resources, time and attention.

The Bible identifies 2 basic types of lust that people are tempted by: "lust of the eyes" and "lust of the flesh" (1 John 2:15-17). Pornography caters to both types by providing visual stimulation that appeals to our "fleshly" desire for sex (more about lust). It also gives us lifelong fuel for lust through the memories of the sexual images. With the help of special hormones released in the brain during sexual arousal, porn images are retained in our memories much longer than non-sexual memories.

Sexual Idolatry: Idolatry is the "worship of a physical object as a god" or an "immoderate attachment or devotion to something." Worship means to show "extravagant respect or admiration for or devotion to an object of esteem" (both from Webster's Dictionary). Many people may not realize that pornography has helped them develop an immoderate or extravagant devotion to sex. Gazing at pornography for hours, masturbating to sexual images and repeatedly fantasizing about sex are basically forms of worshipping sex. People who practice such activities find that sexual images seem to rise to the top and forefront of their thoughts. Their minds become a type of "mental altar" for sex (more about sexual idolatry).

Unfortunately, pornography's powerful appeal leads many into sexual addiction. A life dedicated to pornography, or even just seasoned with occasional viewing of it can become considerably darkened by the many harmful side effects. Here are just a few of the many possible side effects of pornography addiction that we've witnessed:

Perversions (homosexuality, bestiality, bisexuality, transexuality, fetishes, etc.)
Irritability
Sexual imbalance
Sexual dissatisfaction
Masturbation
Lies & deception
Uncontrolled thoughts
Spiritual oppression
Marital strife / destruction / divorce
Corrupted perception of reality
Warped interpersonal skills
Reclusiveness
Fear
Increased tendency toward sexual crime
Guilt & condemnation
Loss of Hope
Depression
Inability to give or receive love
Spiritual death
Torment
Depraved mind
Darkened understanding
Loss of discernment between good & evil
Promiscuity
Lustful eye
(see destruction testimonials for real life examples)

Many of the above effects reflect the fact that there is a spiritual aspect of pornography and sex addiction. Jesus gave us a clue about this in Matthew 6:22-23 NIV: "The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!" Porn is a form of darkness that follows the rule Jesus described. When people view pornography, they open a "doorway" in their lives through their eyes to darkness. The resultant effects of that darkness can be seen in our list above.
Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on October 25, 2009 at 12:59pm
My Personal Struggles with Demons

I have been a Christian since I was about 14 years old growing up in Richmond, Virginia. I remember walking up to the altar one Summer Sunday morning and giving the pastor my hand. I was baptized and became a part of the Body of Christ. It should have been a happy time, but it was the beginning of a war. I was raised in a single parent home in Bridgeport, Connecticut and we later moved to Richmond. I had some serious emotional problems that were hidden from everyone but my mother.

I have suffered from depression as far back as I can remember. I even had a doctor offer to prescribe medication for me when I was a teenager, but my mother refused to make me take it. Thoughts of suicide have haunted me every since I was about 12 years old. My father wasn’t there for me and that was a major contributor to my depression, but it really got worst after I got saved. Looking back I realize it was the enemy trying to cause me to end my life prematurely to abort my calling and mission for God.

My brother was in the Army during the Vietnam War and he had just got home from College before he got drafted. I was a loner and didn’t have many friends, I was a book worm and spent most of my time in the attic reading comic books and yes the Bible. One day I found a trunk in the attic that belonged to my brother, it was filled with pornography. To this day my mother never knew that stuff was in the house. I was right at the age of puberty so you can imagine the effect finding this stuff had on my young life. Needless to say I spent a lot of time in the attic.
The devil knows that our battle starts in the mind; our thoughts are our freedom or our bondage. If our minds are on the truth of the Word, then we walk in freedom and deliverance. The devil knows if we are led by our fleshly desire then we will be in bondage. Satan will provide all of the fuel our flesh needs to keep us in bondage. When I got saved the Holy Spirit convicted me about the pornography. The enemy would back away the more I embrace Jesus and His Word. (James 4:7); The moment I lapsed and stopped praying and studying the Word that is when the opportunities to sin became available.

I am almost 50 years old and I still have urges and compulsions to view pornography. The good news is I KNOW it is an area of weakness, so I avoid place and people that would make pornography available to me. When I was in the military it was very hard because pornography is SO accepted and available. I had to ask the First Sergeant to change roommates twice because they had porno in the room. I am not going to lie and say I was victorious every time. I fell on many occasions, I was frustrating and I was often ashamed about this bondage. I biggest key to victory is admitting you need help and that you can’t do it without God’s help.

What is really amazing is how today I work in a Psychiatric hospital and most of my patients and sex offenders. I believe God ordered my steps this way for a few reasons. Many of the men I deal with were molested as children; also many were exposed to sexual perversions in the homes they grew up in. My own struggles help me be more empathetic towards them and help me be patient when I minister to them.

My prayer is that this book will help you realize that you are NOT alone. Jesus died so we can be free from the powers of darkness. When I was a teenager I didn’t know that demons were subject to Jesus name. I never realized the full extent of the power of God over the devil and his imps. Today I know that pornography is my Kryptonite and I have to avoid it of I will fall. The devil knows what YOUR Kryptonite is, never forget that.

The biggest thing I had to deal with was GUILT, I always felt like a failure in God’s sight, there have been times I begged God to take me home because I grew weary of the struggle. Guilt will destroy a Christian unless they give the struggle over to Jesus Christ. He died on the cross so we could be free from the condemnation of the devil.
Guilt is one of Satan's biggest weapons against us. It tears us down, it makes us feel dirty, unworthy, robs of us of our faith and confidence in Christ Jesus. Jesus not only came to cleanse us from our sins, but also set us free from the guilt of our sins. If you want to live a life of spiritual victory, you need to have a conscience freed from the guilt of your past. 1 Timothy 3:9, "Holding the mystery of the faith in a pure conscience."
Two kinds of guilt
There's two kinds of guilt in the Bible. There's Godly sorrow that leads a person to repentance (2 Cor 7:10), which is know as conviction and it comes from the Holy Spirit (John 16:8, "when He comes, will convict the world concerning sin..." - NASB). Once a person repents, the guilt lifts and they feel relieved and joyful that their sin(s) have been forgiven. Then there's another kind of guilt, and that's condemnation or accusations from the devil. Satan loves to torment God's people by reminding them of their pasts, and continually holding their sins before them even after their sins have been forgiven. This is condemnation and there is no good that comes out of it whatsoever. It tears us down, makes us feel dirty, unworthy and robs of us of our faith and confidence in Christ Jesus. It's a lie from the father of lies, and it needs to be ignored.
The difference between condemnation and conviction is explained in much more detail in the teaching Condemnation verses Conviction.
In this teaching, we will be dealing solely with the negative kind of guilt called condemnation.
Guilt is a door to the enemy
I have seen how guilt can be an open door to be tormented by evil spirits. False guilt is actually a symptom of unforgiveness in your heart that is directed at yourself. In Matthew 18:23-35, Jesus tells us how important it is to forgive those who have wronged us, and how we can be turned over to the tormenters (evil spirits) if we are unforgiving. Collisions 3:13 tells us to be, "...forgiving one another..." The phrase 'one another' in NT Greek translates to the word Heautou, which includes THEMSELF! Bitterness, regardless who or what it's about, defiles a man (Hebrews 12:15). Spiritual defilement is what makes a person open to unclean spirits. It is very possible for a person to be harassed by evil spirits or come under their power, just because a person has refused to forgive them self.
How guilt is cultivated and nurtured
Guilt is cultivated when you continually allow yourself to dwell and think about how badly you've messed up, your pasts, the sins you've committed, etc. The enemy loves to remind us of our past failures, so he can keep us thinking about them. The problem is, if we allow ourselves to fall for this trap, it allows the enemy to build what they call a stronghold in our minds.
Your best bet is to learn what is going on, and stop Satan dead in his tracks. Learn the difference between condemnation and conviction, and stop listening to condemnation. Condemnation comes from the devil, and it's meant to build strongholds in your mind and weaken you spiritually.
Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on October 8, 2009 at 11:29pm
Comment by Mark H. Stevens, Th.D on September 18, 2009 at 1:45pm
What do I do if I have committed sexual sin?
Christians are not exempt from sexual sin. If you are such a person who has fallen into fornication, adultery, pornography, homosexuality, lesbianism, bestiality, or any other sexual deviation, then you need to stop. You need to confess your sins to the Lord and break off your relationships that lead you or tempt you into further sin. This may be hard to hear, but it is what is necessary.
The sexual drive is a very powerful one. It is so strong that it can alter a person's thinking and emotions. It can harden the heart and move us to irrational and sinful decisions. God has created sex for the marriage bed and for there alone. He wants you to be pure in mind and body, reserving the sexual union for the proper context of marriage so that you might properly honor God and your spouse. Failure to do this is to commit grievous sin. But all is not lost.
There is forgiveness in Christ
All of your sexual sins can be forgiven. The blood of Christ is too great to be defeated by your sin. Jesus paid a great price on the cross (1 Pet. 2:24). He shed His blood and gave His life and if you are a Christian, then you have been bought with a great price. You are not your own and the Lord always longs to fellowship with you (1 Cor. 1:9). All you need to know is that you must confess your sin to God and repent of it. This means you stop doing it. You are called by God to purity, not to sexual immorality.
• 1 Cor. 6:18, "Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body."
• Eph. 5:3, "But do not let immorality or any impurity or greed even be named among you, as is proper among saints."
• Col. 3:5, "Therefore consider the members of your earthly body as dead to immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and greed, which amounts to idolatry."
• 1 Thess. 4:2, "For you know what commandments we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. 3 For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; 4 that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, 5 not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God."
The Greek word for "immorality" is porneia which means illicit sexual intercourse, i.e., fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, bestiality, etc. The English word "pornography" is derived from this Greek word. So, you can see that God desires your holiness. After all, this is why you are a Christian, to honor God, glorify Him, and live for Him.
To repeat, if you are in sexual sin, stop it, confess it, break off tempting relationships and situations, and seek the Lord. If you fall again, then go to the cross again. Never give up going to Jesus and receiving the forgiveness that you need. Never think that the Lord Jesus will stop loving you. Never doubt Him. He loves you and knows your struggle.
Then, after you have repented, see if you can find someone to whom you can be accountable. Find someone trustworthy and have them pray with you regularly. It is so true that sometimes beating sexual sin cannot be done alone. Sometimes we need the strength of the body of Christ.
What if I don't repent of my sin?
If you are a Christian involved in sexual sin then you know that the Holy Spirit has been convicting you. If you feel no conviction, then you are either not really saved or are so hardened by the sin you've been committing that you are close to God taking your life. This is the case in 1 Cor. 5:5 where a man was having sex with his father's wife and he would not repent. Paul said, "I have decided to deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of his flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus." Rest assured that God takes this seriously. He will take your life to save your soul. This is a loving move on God's part.
If you are reading this, then the Lord has directed you here because He wants you to know about this issue. If you are in such sin, you know what the Lord requires of you. If you are not in this sin, then thank the Lord for His mercy and continue to seek the Holiness of the Lord.
 

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