Is separation good or bad

[Minister Theresa Cooper]

Hello people of God, I am coming asking for prayer for my marriage. My husband and I just reached six years of marriage. The past two years have been rough. We are talking of separating. Good or bad? Saints please help me out!

[Pastor Zeeshan Robert]

It is not right thing to think about sepration. Trust upon God and He can make the paths smooth and He is only who can remove all obstacles from the ways. I will keep you in my prayer that God may PROTECT you marriage life.....

[Pastor Darryl Maurice Conley]

Minister Cooper my wife and I pray for unity in your marriage, this can only happen if (both) of you surrender and submit to the ways of God. Remember this is a Covenant, a blood covenant you both made with God as a witness.Ecclesiastes 5:1-2 says; Keep thy foot when thou goest to the house of God, and be more ready to hear, than to give the sacrifice of fools: for they consider not that they do evil. Be not rash with thy mouth, and let not thine heart be hasty to utter any thing before God: for God is in heaven. Jesus said in John 16:20; ye shall be sorrowful, but your sorrow shall be turned into Joy...We know, We've been there, but is a RESTORER!!!

[Minister Theresa Cooper]

Thanks again and please pray for us!!

[James M. Sowell III, D.Min.]

Hello Minister Theresa, I’d like to respond to you with respect, compassion, and admiration as your brother in Christ. I've been married 18 years and in ministry 16 of those years. As a younger minister with a spouse also in ministry, I could not wrap my mind around the concept of Christians divorcing or separating due to what I was taught from the scriptures so I preached "don't do it" yet we lacked the wisdom of how to apply our faith in God to help a struggling marriage. As a result, my wife and I endured many heated fellowships seeking advice from others telling us to "just pray" or "trust God." I even had a pastor tell me I needed to put my wife in her place (his wife left him after 25 years). (Reminded me of the bad marriage advice Harpo got in "The Color Purple" Celie said "just beat her") pardon my digression. I believe the intentions were good from all, but it lacked the practical application. I walked away able to give a good Bible lesson but I still had no guidance or clue on how to love my wife the right way and lead my family to reconciliation. What does that look like, for real?

God does not condone divorce but God also know the limitations of our understanding and emotions. Mutually agreed upon separation may be necessary if the dynamic between a couple is unhealthy or explosive. I've seen God-loving Ministers and God-inspiring Prophetesses come to physical blows in some situations. I know of preachers preaching with scratches from the previous night's fight with his spouse. I've seen spouses refuse to "Amen" anything their mates preach because of hypocrisy. I've seen ministers afraid to tell their pastors or leaders of their struggles for fear of being "sat down" or considered "unworthy of the calling" (It is sad when unbelievers, new believers, or the children see this). Where is the disconnect? The key to separation being positive is getting the necessary help that is sought from God and other sources helping both parties reconnect emotionally to God's perfect will concerning marriage and identifying the real issues causing the friction. If both parties are Christians, then the goal of the separation should be reconciliation. You are not each other's enemy, Satan is, and he uses the misunderstandings of life to disrupt God's perfect will in his children.

I counsel many ministers with the goal of restoration, reconciliation, and determination. Then I give the charge like Jesus gave Peter before he betrayed him, once you are converted (restored); strengthen the brothers, or others who will go through the same struggles.

Finally Sis (I'm not doctor, reverend, elder or pastor right now, just brother); you have six years under your belt. You gave your marriage over to God. Pray for yourself, husband, children and reclaim by faith what you believe God ordained six years ago. Find trusting accountability partners for you and your hubby to talk to and help you pray, fast, and pull strength from while working things out. Lastly, ask yourself "do you really want to work it out” if so or if not, seek out "why." If we are not honest with self we give God nothing to work with on our behalf.

Once my wife and I realized we were not each others' enemy we turned our spiritual weapons on the source of our confusion (Satan) and became determined to have a "great" marriage "on purpose" and once that happened, God was able to release the blessings that bitterness, hurt, and resentment got in the way of.

Fellow Christians let us lift our fellow minister up in prayer because the Word she preaches and the souls she teaches are too precious for us to ignore. It could just as well be any of us in the same situation. If so, let's strengthen one another with the testimonies of victory not just theological discussions but compassionate discourse. I pray God releases the necessary revelation according to our faith and hunger for it.

God be glorified, the people be edified, and Satan will be terrified!

[Minister Theresa Cooper]

Thank you Man of God!!!!! This was great!

[James A. McCray Jr.]

Hello Minister Cooper, I would like to share a few comments on separation, me and my wife were married when I was 20 and 26 yrs later we are still married, and both in Ministry, when a couple enters the COVENANT of marriage, it is god that joins them together, and in the vows let no one separate them, marriage is intended to be a lifelong commitment not a temporary solution, being separated only gives room for the enemy to really operate and get all kinds of crazy thoughts going through your mind. when you get a chance read 1 corin 7 10:11 there are more things involved if the spouse is being physically abused. Marriage should not be taken lightly, I have seen a lot of couples do a trial separation to see what they really want out of life and all this does is cause them to drift further and further apart. I am not an expert but I have experience so stay in there and rely on god, because if you put god first everything else will work out, god bless, and remember it was god who put you 2 together, lets not dissapoint our father.

[Minister Theresa Cooper]

Thank you!!!

[Mrs. Opportunity]

Sister, I have been married for 12 years to a preacher and everyday has not been Sunday. It is important that as people of God, we seek him when we are going through. The devil is busy destroying the bond of marriage that God ordained. Pray and let the Lord lead you and your husband. I don't know what the problems are but I believe that somewhere there is a lack of communication. I hope this helps.

God's Choicest Blessings!

[Minister Theresa Cooper]

Thanks!!!

[Evangelist Gloria F.Walton]

If you desire to put your buisness out here,then you must go into more details. How can anyone really
help you out,without knowing your story. Think about it. God bless you.

[Minister Theresa Cooper]

I appreciate your concern but there are ways of doing things. I was coming as a sister in Christ believing that others in this forum would understand that the bible tells us to pray for and encourage one another. The question was asked is separation good or bad? Now if it was not enough details for you, you could have sent me an email cuz others replied and didn't have a problem. So if you are Godly concerned my email is [e-mail]. Thanks and God bless you!

[Bishop Rickey D. Williams]

The problem is no matter who's at fault, it's the marriage that's being bankrupt. You both have to be in a marriage that works for the two of you. You get what you negotiate, so you both need to meet each other in the middle. Somewhere in the midst of all this, you both got lost. So, pray together, work the Word together, forgive each other (because you're both at fault; somebody's taking way too much, and somebody's not giving enough), communicate, find out what's distracted you and reduced you to this point, and get your romance and your groove back. And never let life take away the love because seperation opens doors that you don't open. Now isn't the time to seperate unless it puts you and any children you have together at risk. Never let anyone give you anything but a happy ending.