My Baby Is A Man Now!

[Missionary Twanya Johnson]

I am a married mother of four sons and my first just graduated and left home...I know that we have raised him up in the word...and i have faith that he will fall back on God when his storms come...he still comes to church and pays the drums..but he has started to slacking when it comes to bible study...deacon classes and other activities has has obligated himself to. I really want to talk to him about it, but need some help on approaching him as a man and not a child. My husband has talked to him and says i need to reinforce what he has said but he told me if I approach him as a mother to a boy he will buck...it is hard for me because i still see that helpless little boy I brought home 19 yrs ago. Help me Saints!

[Tonja L. Williams]

Amen to that and if you find a solution let me know two years ago I went through this with my daughter and now I'm dealing with 18yr old and hope I don't have to go through it with my youngest in 4yrs. God Bless Amen

[Apostle/ProphetessEvelyn Adewoye]

Good Evening Missionary Twanya Johnson! I am a mother of four. I have 3 girls at age 10, 12, 21 yrs, and one boy at 16 yrs. How I approached my 21 year old daughter. I talk to her about life in general from the physical level, and the spiritual level. As far as the physical level we talk about her relationships with her girlfriends, and boyfriends. I develop not only a parent relationship, but a friendship because I didn't want her to go on the outside, and talk with others that may give her the wrong advice, or lure her into things that we teach to beware of. I wanted to make her as comfortable as possible so she can trust to talk to me about anything. Somethings she did hide from me because I warn her of the punishment, and even the consequences she will face if she gets herself in trouble. Even though she hid things from me for a while, but it won't last because she will end up coming to me to share with me because I gave her the encouragement that I am open to communication don't matter how bad, and we can come to a solution to her problem, but I will correct, and discipline her. I do get mad, and angry. I will go on and on when speaking to her. I will tell her, it not like I don't want you to do anything, meet friends, or having any enjoyment in life. I just want you to take precautions. Think before you do it, and look at the consequences you will face. It can cost you your life. I tell her, this is why I put restrictions on you. I am not trying to hurt you, but make you a better person. I don't want you to get caught up with being on drugs, getting in trouble, having all these babies, not being able to finish your education, and you won't be able to get a good job to take care of you, and if you decide to have a family. First, I always tell her she have to have a life with God, keep believing in Jesus Christ, and walking in the ways that God instruct us because when we are disobedient, we are chastised. God will punish us. It is just like a parent that punishes her child. Amen. She did fell to the streets a lttle, almost didn't finish high school, but me as a parent I had to show tough love. I had to get outrageous to show her I mean business. Honestly, I was not calm at all. I had to deliberately, practically put up a fight to make her finish high school. I had to spare that rod. She finished high school with a 3.75 grade point average from all Ds and Fs. She got pregnant in her last year of high school, but I pushed her. When she got disrespectful. Yes, I was quick to let her know, she don't like my rules she can take care of herself. You will see what the streets wil give you, and it won't be good. Those guys you dealing with don't care nothing about you because if they did you wouldn't be home with me. They will put you in your own place. I brought her up in the word of God, she was involved in the church in the dance ministry, drama ministry, and she is an excellent writer. She wanted that good time in the streets because her friends, and her friends will say your mother is nice, but she is too strict. A couple of her friends will listen to me, and some will say they wish they had a mother like her to talk to like that. I heard one of her friend tell her, you need to listen to your mother because her mother don't even communicate with her. She just worry about herself. Get mad when I want to talk to her about things, and say she don't want to hear it. Don't come to me with that, her friend say her mother would say. She won't even listen to anything about her friends or relationship with boys. You should appreciate your mother. Yes, she is 21, and have 2 kids now, but she is in school, on a job training, and have her own place. I showed her tough love, and to take responsiblities of her own children. I don't make it easy for her. I always talk to her about keeping her life with God. You can't do nothing without God. I don't force her, but I remind her. It is her choice, but I let her know the consequences without God. When she call me for advice, I listen, I give her my point of view in the physical, and then I feed her the word of God. Amen. My son is 16 years old, and I am doing the same thing with him. He talks to me about his friends, and girls that like him in school. One inviting him to the prom. Believe me we are having talks about sex, protecting himself, the importance of his education, and having a career before he thinks about a family. I give him a little space to go out with friends, but Mom and Dad must meet them, We let them come here to watch the game. I talk to them to see where their mind is, and what they want out of life. I ask them have they ever accept Christ in their life. Yes, some said very young when they went to church with their parents. I ask about their church. How often they go. I talk to them about keeping their life with God, talk time to read their bible, and learn to pray. I offer them to come, and talk to me. If they want to come to my house, and study with us they can. Let their parents know that they are coming to my house. We as parents have to keep an open relationship with our children, and their friends. Get to know your children friends, please. You will know what kind of friends they hang out with, their upbringing when you ask questions, and if they didn't have the right upbringing they will appreciate you if you gain an open communication and relationship with them. You will gain respect from them. Amen. I hope this help all parents who have teenagers, and young adult children. Most of all, parents, pray at all times, and even fast. Speak over your children lives, and even the lives of their friends. Pray for your children salvation, deliverance, healing, and protection, and their friends. Amen. God bless all! Please feel free to join us at www.hurtingwomenhealingministries.ning.com.