MARRIAGE,

[Evangelist.R.Chandrasekaran.]

MARRIAGE, GOD’S WORD ON “I now pronounce you man and wife,” the minister says. The bride and groom look lovingly into each other’s eyes. Family, friends, even casual acquaintances feel like cheering. Two people have found each other, pledged to each other a lifetime of commitment, vowed to be devoted and loving, and promised never to leave or forsake each other. Vows of faithfulness are the bedrock of marriage. Through those vows two people, in a miraculous way, become one. Then begins a lifetime of working together, worshiping together, playing together, loving together, raising children together, building a home together, solving problems together. God’s loving relationship with his people is so similar to the marriage relationship that he uses human marriage to illustrate his covenant with his people in the Old Testament and Christ’s love for the church in the New Testament. WHERE DID THE IDEA OF MARRIAGE BEGIN? Genesis 2:18-25 . . . The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion who will help him.” Mark 10:6-9 . . . This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one. Marriage was God’s idea from the very beginning. It is as old as Eden yet as fresh as the last wedding. God, a sacred relationship, and one not to be entered into lightly ordain marriage. WHY DID GOD ESTABLISH MARRIAGE? Genesis 2:18-25 . . . The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion who will help him.” God established marriage for companionship. Genesis 1:28 . . . God blessed them and told them, “Multiply and fill the earth and subdue it.” Malachi 2:15 . . . Didn’t the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. God established marriage as the best environment for raising children. Marriage was designed to help children learn about love by being born into a loving relationship. How tragic when parents fail to model Christ’s love before their children. Ephesians 5:31-32 . . . As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. God established marriage as a symbol of Christ and the church. A marriage under God should teach the couple much about how God relates to his church. WHAT KIND OF RELATIONSHIP SHOULD A MARRIAGE BE? Genesis 2:18 . . . The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a companion who will help him.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 . . . Two people can accomplish more than twice as much as one. . . .If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. 1 Corinthians 11:3 . . . There is one thing I want you to know: A man is responsible to Christ, a woman is responsible to her husband, and Christ is responsible to God. Matthew 19:4-6 . . . “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’ And he said, ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one, let no one separate them, for God has joined them together.” Marriage at its best is a relationship so close and intimate that the two of you work together as one. It involves mutual trust, mutual support, mutual defense, mutual comfort, mutual vulnerability, mutual responsibility. WHAT ARE THE KEYS TO A HAPPY, STRONG MARRIAGE? Joshua 24:15 . . . Choose today whom you will serve . . . But as for me and my family, we will serve the Lord. A united purpose to serve the Lord is a key to a good marriage. Proverbs 5:15 . . . Drink water from your own well-share your love only with your wife. Proverbs 5:18-19 . . . Rejoice in the wife of your youth . . . Let her breasts satisfy you always. May you always be captivated by her love. Hebrews 13:4 . . . Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. Faithfulness is a key to a good marriage. Without faithfulness there is no real trust or intimacy. Matthew 19:4-6 . . . Since they are no longer two but one, let no one separate them, for God has joined them together. Commitment is a key to a good marriage. Romans 15:1-2 . . . We should please others. If we do what helps them, we will build them up in the Lord. Sacrifice is a key to a good marriage. Romans 15:5-7 . . . May God . . . help you live in complete harmony with each other-each with the attitude of Christ Jesus toward the other. Then all of you can join together with one voice, giving praise and glory to God. Understanding each other’s differences and celebrating them are keys to a good marriage. Ephesians 5:21-33 . . . Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Mutual submission is a key to a good marriage. 1 Corinthians 13:1-13 . . . Love will last forever. Love is a key to a good marriage. James 5:16 . . . Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other. Communication is a key to a good marriage. Proverbs 31:31 . . . Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise. A constant desire to build each other up enhance each other’s value is a key to a good marriage. 1 Corinthians 7:3 . . . The husband should not deprive his wife of sexual intimacy . . . nor should the wife deprive her husband. Song of Songs 1:2-4, 12-13 . . . Kiss me again and again, for your love is sweeter than wine . . . Bring me into your bedroom, O my king . . . My lover is like a sachet of myrrh lying between my breasts. A healthy sex life is a key to a good marriage. HOW SHOULD A HUSBAND TREAT HIS WIFE? Proverbs 18:22 . . . The man who finds a wife finds a treasure and receives favor from the Lord. Ecclesiastes 9:9 . . . Live happily with the woman you love through all the meaningless days of life that God has given you in this world. The wife God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil. 1 Peter 3:7 . . . In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat her with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. If you don’t treat her as you should, your prayers will not be heard. Ephesians 5:21 . . . You will submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Husbands should love their wives sacrificially, with the depth of love that Christ showed when he died for us. HOW SHOULD A WIFE TREAT HER HUSBAND? Proverbs 31:11-12 . . . Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She will not hinder him but help him all her life. Ephesians 5:22-24 . . . You wives will submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of his body, the church; he gave his life to be her Savior. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives must submit to your husbands in everything. A wife should love her husband sacrificially, helping and supporting him, believing in him and submitting to him as he submits in Christlike love to her (Ephesians 5:21). WHAT IS THE IMPORTANCE OF LOYALTY IN A MARRIAGE? Malachi 2:15-16 . . . Didn’t the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard yourself; remain loyal to the wife of your youth. God commands a husband to be loyal to his wife. He does not merely suggest this. Proverbs 5:15, 18-19 . . . Drink water from your own well-share your love only with your wife. Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth. She is a loving doe, a graceful deer. Let her breasts satisfy you always. May you always be captivated by her love. 1 Corinthians 7:2-4 . . . The husband should not deprive his wife of sexual intimacy, which is her right as a married woman, nor should the wife deprive her husband. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband also gives authority over his body to his wife. Hebrews 13:4 . . . Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. Husbands and wives must be faithful to each other, seeking to satisfy and honor each other. A GOOD WIFE OR HUSBAND BRINGS MANY GREAT BLESSINGS TO THE OTHER. Proverbs 31:10-31 . . . Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is worth more than precious rubies. Proverbs 31:11 . . . Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. Proverbs 31:12 . . . She will not hinder him but help him all her life. Ecclesiastes 9:9 . . . Live happily with the woman you love through all the meaningless days of life . . . The wife God gives you is your reward for all your earthly toil. The next time something irritates you about your spouse, keep in mind the blessings your mate brings to you as well-precious times, trust, satisfaction, fulfilled needs, helpfulness, happiness. WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY ABOUT SELECTING A MARRIAGE PARTNER? WHY SHOULD WE BE CAREFUL WHOM WE MARRY? Judges 14:3 . . . His father and mother objected strenuously, “Isn’t there one woman in our tribe or among all the Israelites you could marry? Why must you go to the pagan Philistines to find a wife?” But Samson told his father, “Get her for me. She is the one I want.” 1 Kings 11:2 . . . The Lord had clearly instructed his people not to intermarry with those nations, because the women they married would lead them to worship their gods. Yet Solomon insisted on loving them anyway. Ezra 9:2 . . . The men of Israel have married women from these people and have taken them as wives for their sons. So the holy race has become polluted by these mixed marriages. 2 Corinthians 6:14 . . . Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. How can goodness be a partner with wickedness? The person we marry can build us up or destroy us. The Bible encourages us not to marry someone who is an unbeliever, because it is too easy for that person to tempt us away from our faith. And if we are marrying another believer, we still must be sure we are marrying for the right reasons. BUT WHAT IF A CHRISTIAN HAS ALREADY MARRIED AN UNBELIEVER? SHOULD THEY STAY TOGETHER? 1 Corinthians 7:12-16 . . . If a Christian woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he is willing to continue living with her, she must not leave him. Don’t leave your mate just because he or she doesn’t know Christ. If possible, win that person to Christ and then both you and your children will greatly benefit. HOW DOES GOD COMPARE MARRIAGE WITH OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM? Isaiah 54:5-6 . . . Your Creator will be your husband . . . For the Lord has called you back from your grief-as though you were a young wife abandoned by her husband. Jeremiah 3:20 . . . “You have betrayed me . . . You have been like a faithless wife who leaves her husband,” says the Lord. 2 Corinthians 11:2 . . . [Paul writes,] “I am jealous for you with the jealousy of God himself. For I promised you as a pure bride to one husband, Christ.” Our relationship with God, like marriage, is based on mutual love, faithfulness, and permanent commitment. IS MARRIAGE GOD’S WILL FOR EVERYONE? Matthew 19:10-12 . . . Jesus’ disciples then said to him, “Then it is better not to marry!” “Not everyone can accept this statement,” Jesus said. “Only those whom God helps. Some are born as eunuchs, some have been made that way by others, and some choose not to marry for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Let anyone who can, accept this statement.” 1 Corinthians 7:1-2, 7-9 . . . Now about the questions you asked in your letter. Yes, it is good to live a celibate life. But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband. I wish everyone could get along without marrying, just as I do. But we are not all the same. God gives some the gift of marriage, and to others he gives the gift of singleness. Now I say to those who aren’t married and to widows-it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust. God created marriage and called it good (see Genesis 2:18-25). Marriage is also the only way through which God intended children to be born and raised. But the Bible also makes it clear that marriage is not for everyone. Sometimes, because of certain cultural or spiritual reasons, marriage is best avoided.