Not Tonight Honey.................I'm Blogging

[Joan Gilchrist]

Every morning, Samuel's wife, Nicole, connects to the Internet and does nothing else until it's time for work. After a long
day at the office, she's back online playing games. Nicole enters online
game tournaments and has thousands of reward points from her hours
spent on the computer. When she isn't "gaming," she's blogging about her
experiences and virtual chatting on various sites.

One evening Samuel glanced at the screen and noticed she was playing a game that facilitated two players. Thinking it would be great to join her for a few moments, Samuel asked if he could play.
Nicole refused, saying Samuel would just beat her anyway.

Refusals like this have caused a rift in their relationship. They don't talk and Nicole makes minimal contributions to their marriage. Samuel feels his wife acts like a "Zombie" and has no
interest in anything but the computer.

Thus the proverbial "headache" is reinforced as women genuinely experience headaches from excessive time spent in front of their computer. For other women, social media is the latest excuse for
avoiding intimacy in the bedroom and in every day relationships.

Electronic distractions are available 24/7 as we carry computers in pockets and purses, making us available to everyone, all the time. Everyone except those who matter the most.

Dedicated time for a spouse has been replaced with cyber relationships, networking and status updates. Online, people are playing games, shopping, reading books, listening to music and podcasts
and even engaging in inappropriate relationships. Online relationships
are appealing. Women can be anyone online: taller, thinner, smarter and
wittier. They can be experts at many subjects, find people to
commiserate with and receive comfort from those experiencing similar
problems.

Maintaining an online persona can take several hours per day, and women are dedicating countless daytime and evening hours to relational pursuits. Online interactions often appear more "real" to
some women than their relationships with immediate family.

Making friends online isn't all bad. Women build real-life relationships, find jobs, buy or sell items and receive advice from industry professionals. Problems arise however, when computer time
detracts from real life and quality relationships.

What's Happened To Date Nights? 

[HOPE - Psalm 43:5]

This is a great blog!!!

What I see in this blog is "fruit". There is a root cause to the wife's actions...a unexposed reason why the wife is online much. It could be a number of reasons. One reason could be that maybe she is running from something.

It is no different from the person who overeats (addictive eating) or a person who is addicted to sex or addicted to drugs or addicted to alcohol. These are ALL actions of a person who is running from something.

GET TO THE ROOT... don't just look at the fruit. You don't destroy an apple tree by picking up the apples off the ground or even cutting off the branches that the apples grow on. The only way to destroy the apple tree would be to get to the root or root system.

Find out what she is running from or avoiding because she doesn't want to deal with it or maybe doesn't feel she can deal with it, and you will no longer see the fruit of over indulgence of internet use (or over indulgence in other areas).

Now the only thing I disagree with is that online relationships cannot be "quality" relationships. I do agree that when married, over indulgence in it will affect the marriage relationship. But as general statement that online relationships can't be quality relationships just isn't true.

If the situation was flipped and the husband was in the military and the wife at home...then the ONLY quality time they would have would be online.

If it is a friend or relative that lives far from you and you can only reach them by phone or internet, then that would be quality time.

Also, women aren't the only ones who are dedicating countless times day and night to relational pursuits. If that were the case, then online dating would be filled with women with very little men. I understand what you are saying in relation to this particular blog topic but some of your general statements (although very much applicable to this blog) are not necessarily true.

Just as the printing press revolutionized the way we communicate with one another (instead of passing down info verbally), so the internet has revolutionized the way we communicate.

So, as the husband tried to communicate with his wife by asking to join in on the online game... (which she should have accepted), the internet is not necessarily as bad as people make it out to be. Like any tool, it can be used or misused. I can use a hammer to build or to destroy.

This husband and wife here in your blog can have intimate moments online AND offline. They can "play" with each other throughout the day online and then come home and "play" in person.

The problem with having an online persona is that people have been treating it as a "mask" to hide their "real' selves...when in truth they are exposing themselves in what they feel is a safe place to do it. So, if this wife is exposing a part of personality thru this online persona and she can't expose that part of herself to her husband... then that is also something to look into.

Women are most definitely catching up to the electronic gadgetry craze but men have been there longer. And now our children have surpassed us LOL This generation is called.. The Millennials. And the BEST way to reach them is going to be thru their online personas because that is where they are.

Like the woman at the well... if that is where this wife is at... go to the well and meet her there and minister to her there and then you will see her leave the well...

just some thoughts to ponder.

[evangelst pastor susie houston]

shall a singel person date before they get marriage? of shall they not date and just get marriage? how do a single preson no when they are ready to date of get marriage?

[Clarence]

I liked this post because it reaches on the subject matter of are we allowing time thieves to distract from our offline interpersonal relationships. It could be TV or anything. That is why it's so important set time specifically for just being together. With all the worldly distractions turned off.

Clarence
Crown Prince of Web 2.0
You've never had Coffee Like This

[Preacher]

basiacally she's being disobediant to God and destroying her own home..

1 Corinthians 7:5
Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

Proverbs 14:1
The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.

GB

[Clarice Johnson,FBI]

Sis Joan:
I believe it to do more damage than ministering.
Especially if there are daughters involved she's sending out a wrong messages
when and if they become wives. Us older women are to teach the younger women
how to be wives and caretakers of our own homes.
You continue being blessed,
Clarice