Infidelity & Cheating in a marriage...If a child is born as a result, should the spouse except the child?

[Child of the Kingdom]

If a child is born as a result of infidelity and cheating in a marriage should the spouse accept the child? More and more this is a topic amongst believers and non-believers. It is very touchy because many feel that the child being innocent in all of this deserves to have both mom and dad. What say ye?

For the sake of discussion and because this is the most common scenario, we will use the husband. Please understand what you are asking to suggest that a wife accepts her husbands child born out of infidelity. I do know of case where the wife did accept this and the husband ultimately ended up leaving her for the woman whose child he fathered.

In saying that, is it wrong if a wife decides to play the role of Sarah and demand that her husband send the woman and her child packing with no further contact.

Genesis 21:10
Wherefore she said unto Abraham, Cast out this bondwoman and her son: for the son of this bondwoman shall not be heir with my son, even with Isaac.

[Child of the Kingdom]

FUGETT: DO YOU READ THE NEWS. MANY MEN WALK AWAY FROM THEIR CHILDREN AND DON'T LOOK BACK. THIS IS WHY YOU HAVE SO MANY SINGLE MOMS.

You are right, nobody has the right to harm a child physically or mentally, keeping one from it's father is not Christ like. This is why the children of the MARRIAGE WILL TAKE PRECEDENTS OVER THE OTHER WOMAN'S CHILD.

You don't understand, Most men are not looking to have a relationship with their illegitimate child if it means leaving their other children. LIKE IT OR NOT THAT IS THE WAY IT IS.

[Evangelist Altha Fugett]

We are not talking about many men, and what many men do is not to be an used as an excuse or example by a good man especially a man that reverences God.

What this simply boils down to is wether the wife has the strength of the Lord to believe in her husbands recommitment to her. I know that it can't be easy. But forgiveness is forgiveness, If I chose to stay, I as a wife that loved my husband would have to consider his feelings. If not it would be all about me.

Life is not just about ourselves, again this is an innocent baby, I met my bio father at the age of 49, I called him on the phone and said I am your daughter, the man broke down in tears, thanking God, he had not died before he could explain to me why he was not in my life.

My mother had poisoned my mind, that he didn't care for me because he didn't marry her. See EW you don't have the market on this.! and you have a few more years to experience some things.

I love my father Im more like him than my mother or my beautiful step-father, I regret the years we missed, but we are making it up.

[Child of the Kingdom]

That is wonderful Fugett,
But, was your mom a mistress? I am talking about Marriage here. IF A MAN HAS TO MAKE A CHOICE MOST WILL CHOSE THEIR FAMILY, WIFE AND KIDS. BECAUSE MOST DID NOT WANT A CHILD TO BEGIN WITH, WITH THEIR MISTRESS. MOST TIMES THE MISTRESS WAS ONLY ABOUT THE SEX NOT BABIES.

BOTTOM LINE IS SOMEBODIES GOING TO BE HURT AND WHY SHOULD IT BE THE WIFE AND KIDS.

[Toni]

the "wife and kids" are supposed to be covered by the husband.... but if he is out there for himself without regard to his wife and kids then they have no covering.... and too often this means they will get hurt. They are naked, without protection. What you gonna do? let go and let God in this case.... forgive them both: your mom your dad and yourself

[Child of the Kingdom]

Most were in in for the fun not the baby. So to suggest that he ruins his other children's lives for the sake of one is unrealistic.

[Evangelist Altha Fugett]

No he had two girlfriends pregnant, and didn't marry either one, and moved to another state to keep a promise to a fiance, (rolleyes) military love (roll eyes again)

You stated BOTTOM LINE IS SOMEBODIES GOING TO BE HURT AND WHY SHOULD IT BE THE WIFE AND KIDS.

The wife and the children have ALREADY been hurt, why give the devil a foothole with a lie, a bro/sis exists in the world to those children. THEY NEED TO KNOW THAT.

The forgiving wife needs to sit down with her husband and work out boundaries for this relationship, and if the husband has to continue to seek out a relationship with this woman, LET HIM HAVE HER.

Great discussion EW

[Child of the Kingdom]

Yes it is a great discussion. I saw a similar video discussion on Youtube called The Luv Lounge. They were in a lounge having an open forum discussion and you'd be surprised to see how the men think versus the woman. It is a little different than infidelity but it exposes how men are not really into the children as you may think.

THIS VIDEO IS FROM A SINGLE WOMAN'S STANDPOINT, NOT A MARRIAGE STANDPOINT. BUT YOU CAN CERTAINLY SEE WHERE AND HOW THE PROBLEM OF BABY MAMA DRAMA CAN UPSET A NATION.

[Evangelist Altha Fugett]

It's not about men being into children, they shouldn't have been into the wrong woman, and produced a child, when the child comes, they need to handle their bizness, I will look at the video in a bit, thanks

[Toni]

"if the husband has to continue to seek out a relationship with this woman, LET HIM HAVE HER."

amen to that one

[Toni]

There is this weekly show on TLN, which gives advice and counsel about marriage and marital issues. I saw it the first time yesterday evening. Pastor Bob is the guys name who moderates. Last night this subject being discussed here came up. Pastor Bob said that man, in his unregenerated state, would naturally be a polygamist. It is only when a man chooses to live under the banner of Christ, making a conscious daily choice to honor his commitment to Christ and to his wife, that he can live with one woman for a lifetime. In other words, its against (an unsaved) mans very nature to be monogamous. ONly in Christ can man be monogamous, and woman be virtuous...

I've heard things along these lines before, and have my own share of testimony in this area... but everytime I hear it it still trips me out. But God.