Where did this title come from? Was it ordained by God? A missionary is not considered a title, it is simply a person going on a mission. When did God instruct us to honor the pastor by giving his wife a particular title?
Being "old fashioned" is irrelevant to the conversation, the point is often not because of a title, but often its just because she feels she is above all because of whose wife she is. I had to confront a pastor once because of his wife's behavior. She said some untoward things to my fiance at the time, and it needed to be corrected and that correction had to come from her husband.
Perhaps if we worried less about the title and more about the person and considered that a person is not a reflection of a title nor is a title reflective of a person. You are and ever will be Spencer before you are Rev Miller. The issue is when people cannot separate themselves from their so called titles.
I thought this was done, but gentlemen you bring a different light to the question at hand. Does the title have anything to do with abuse of authority? Regardless of what you may call the pastor's wife in a church (Realize there are few titles in the church that are actually used in the Bible the way we use them today. Every denomination has taken their spin on things. This has been done because many of us have to balance authority in different polities. The concept is biblical, although the use of the different titles is debatable) In this case, let's take away any titles for the remainder of our discussion. Does that change anything? Let me know what you think and why?
None of the gospel proclaimers in the Bible ever refered to themselves as Reverend, only God is referred to by that title (in the OT).But then again due to differences in polity, I understand the use of it.
Pastor and Bishop have the same contextual connotation in the Bible, so they pretty much mean the same thing. Refer to the book of Timothy. This is why many denominations don't use the term bishop unless it has been redefined. It is redundant, but then again due to differences in polity, I understand the use of it.
Apostle has been used in so many different ways in contemporary christianity. I would be shocked to see it used correctly. But then again due to differences in polity, I understand the use of it.
and the list goes on.....