- At 10:16pm on May 17, 2010, James Franklyn Everett said…
- My heart is breaking right now Im so saddened because of the way I allowed the devil to decieve me and use me. I wasted so much of my life. And I really love God and let Him down so. I spent so much of my life looking to belong somewhere. Never had a real family, Dont know what real love feels like. It always hurts so. Looking at your family makes me sad. I wish I had what you have. No Im not coveting which is to wish I had it and you didn't. But I wish I had loved and togetherness Someone who loved me when I was a growing up. ( a family) I spent my life trying to fit into other peoples families. My mom and dad weren't there. My brother and sister suffered from the same brokenness i did. He, been in jail from child hood till now, and my sister contracted aids. Trying to fit in somewhere. Its hard to be sucessful at something when your filled with rejection. Im sorry I dont mean to burden you, I just had to get it out and there's no one else to talk to. Now look at me, Opressed by demons, I"m praying that this oppression isn't unto death. What a waste. sometimes we grow up so alone and try to be so brave about it because of shame we never tell anyone. We just suffer alone in silence. Its not Good for the man to be alone. You can be in a crowd of a miilon people and still be all alone without some one to love you. and Im not just talking about the opposite sex. I mean just someone there who cares and understands. That really gets you and its ok. I foud no rest for my heart so i drowned it in drugs and alcohol. I didnt know at the time that it would make me into a slave. I was dead for 25 years and now that im awake my heart is breaking under the weight of my sins. Please pray for me I am truely sorry for my sins.
God Bless you.
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