This issue has bothered me for some time and I am bringing it to you my fellow laborers in Christ.
What to do when trying to help someone understand that things are may not be as they appear. I am trying to show a young lady that even though she thinks people do not like her and even if it is not true she does not go to church for people to like her or for their acceptance.

Please any help will be of greatly appreciated.

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Good Evening,

By any chance did you ask the woman in question, does she like the people that she thinks does not like her? Has she been saved long? Did she just accept Jesus as her personal savior? Is she a person that complains all the time? I mean it could be a lot of reasons why you are not getting through to her. Also I have found out in ministry people see themselves in other people the things that they don't like about themselves.

Well I hope this helped you out some. I will put the young lady in question in prayer that she will stand in spite of how she feels the people feel. God bless you and may you have a bless holiday. bking
Sounds as if she has a self image and self esteem issue. If she does not see God's imagry when she looks in the mirror, she needs to be led in that direction. There are many biblical characters that come to mind. Eve comes to mind, she had everything going for her, but was decived into thinking there was more.

The church folk issue is another dillemma. It is unfortunate that so many seek each other in church, instead of seeking God. Once ones worship life is established, the need for acceptance by others diminishes. I encourage you to begin the process of reuniting her with God...not people. Once that is accomplished, church becomes easy.
ITA (in total agreement) with Pastor Young.
Sister friend is having an identity crisis.
Once you really know whose you are your need to be received by other people diminish.
I heard a preacher preach from the title of Beyonce's song "You must not know about me" as he went down the list of things the new life in Christ brings.

I am a child of God.
John 1:12
I am a branch of the true vine, and a conduit of Christ's life.
John 15:1-5
I am a friend of Jesus.
John 15:15
I have been justified and redeemed.
Romans 3:23-24; Romans 6:6
I will not be condemned by God, I have been set free from the law of sin and death.
Romans 8:1-2
As a child of God, I am a fellow heir with Christ.
Romans 8:17
I have been accepted by Christ.
Romans 15:7
I have been called to be a saint
1 Corinthians 1:2; Ephesians 1:1; Philippians 1:1; Colossians 1:2
In Christ Jesus, I have wisdom, righteousness, sanctification, and redemption.
1 Corinthians 1:30
My body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who dwells in me
1 Corinthians 3:16; 1 Corinthians 6:19
I am joined to the Lord and am one spirit with him.
1 Corinthians 6:17
God leads me in the triumph and knowledge of Christ.
2 Corinthians 2:14
The hardening of my mind has been removed in Christ.
2 Corinthians 3:14
I am a new creature in Christ.
2 Corinthians 5:17
I have become the righteousness of God in Christ.
2 Corinthians 5:21
I have been made one with all who are in Christ Jesus.
Galatians 3:28
I am no longer a slave but a child of an heir.
Galatians 4:7
I have been set free in Christ.
Galatians 5:1
I have been blessed with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places.
Ephesians 1:3
I am chosen, holy, and blameless before God.
Ephesians 1:4
I am redeemed and forgiven by the grace of Christ.
Ephesians 1:7
I have been predestined by God to obtain an inheritance.
Ephesians 1:9-11
I have been sealed with the Holy Spirit of promise.
Ephesians 1:13
Because of God's mercy and love, I have been made alive with Christ.
Ephesians 2:4-5
I am seated in the heavenly places with Christ.
Ephesians 2:6
I am God's workmanship created to produce good works.
Ephesians 2:10
I have been brought near to God by the blood of Christ.
Ephesians 2:13
I am a member of Christ's body and a partaker of His promise.
Ephesians 3:6; Ephesians 5:30
I have boldness and confident access to God through faith in Christ.
Ephesians 3:12
My new self is righteous and holy.
Ephesians 4:22-24
I was formerly darkness, but now I am light in the Lord.
Ephesians 5:8
I am a citizen of heaven.
Philippians 3:20
The peace of God guards my heart and mind.
Philippians 4:7
God supplies all my needs.
Philippians 4:19
I have been made complete in Christ.
Colossians 2:9-10
I have been raised up with Christ.
Colossians 3:1
My life is hidden with Christ in God.
Colossians 3:3
Christ is my life, and I will be revelaed with him in glory.
Colossians 3:4
I have been chosen of God, and I am holy and beloved.
Colossians 3:12
God loves me and has chosen me.
1 Thessalonians 1:4
Hi Pastor Evans,

His Word tells us not to be anxious in anything. We should pray for
this young lady (which I will be doing). Then we wait on the Lord
while we are asking ...

Believe it & claim it in His name, who is above every other name.

God bless you,

Mark Seay
remind her about what God said about the friendship of the world being a enemy
Hi Evans :-), here's what you do, you tell her that 'God' likes her. God created her and God is more with her than the whole world against her. God designed her for a purpose. That purpose is to glorify God via being the best person she can be. You tell her that 'self-consciousnes' on that level is the enemy psychologically and emotionally attacking her.
As so, it is wrong to yield to that spirit.

She must focus on God's design for her at all times. Believers'will love believers' if they are truly walking in the spirit. Righteous people love to see the righteousness, goodness, love, beauty of believers so she is honor bound to Christ to fight that spirit and come forth to be a blessing to others.

Tell her there are people who would love to be in her situation. There are children starving in the world. There are savage wars going on in the world. There are children right here in the U.S. who need a teacher, mentor, etc. and she, as a believer is honor bound to 'let her light so shine before men that they may see her good works and glorify God in heaven."

Okay, use these truths to enlighten her and God bless you for being there to assist her out of the darkness that the enemy would keep her in.
I think it is difficult to be prescriptive with the little info we have here. Of course we understand your need for discretion and preserving the privacy of the individual.

I assume a few things:
1) You have a relationship of sorts with this person--in the sense this is not a casual request but from someone you have a ministry relationship with.
2. This person values your counsel
3. You have ascertained that the individual is not in need of professional help from mental health practitioners etc (just asking, not that anything you said gave that impression).

I would suggest listening a bit more. Let her know that a solution may emerge in time and it will come from her through the Lord's help.
The most difficult thing for people in ministry is disabusing people of the notion that we will always have a solution, or underplaying our role in their healing. Break the dependency syndrome and allow her to be empowered (notice I did not say empower her).
Admit your limitations, but open the door to the God of no limitations.

May God bless you as you continue to be an agent of Divine healing and restoration.
Here's story I heard from a seasoned preacher about when he was child sitting in church. He said that he was sitting next to his mother and overheard two women sitting directly behind by them. The women were talking about his mother and they spoke loud enough for he and his mother to hear every evil word uttered out of their mouths. He said that he couldn't take it any longer and turned to his mother and said, "Momma don't you hear all those horrible things they are saying about you? (Mind you the pastor was already in the middle of his text) his mother turned to him and said, "The Word of God is being preached, those women are behind me but the Word of God is right before me, now where do you think I should focus my attention?" Please let this young lady know that the devil has many distractions at his disposal. Let her know that whatever he can do to take her attention off of Jesus will do it. Let her know as well that devil quite often uses people (sometimes church folk) to get his job done. Let her know that she has to work out her own salvation, in the words of the late Bishop G. E. Patterson, "God has delivered me twice, He delivered me from sin and then he delivered me from people" may the Lord the bless and keep you is my prayer.
You never know whats going own with her self-estem or what went own in her home as a child all i can say is to keep praying for her and help build up her sel-estem.

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Blessings all,

I believe that the worship experience we encounter at church should be as comfortable as possible. People are going to be people. They talked about Jesus, didn't like him, crucified him but it didn't stop him from doing what he knew he was supposed to do. Remind her that she is not responsible for how people treat her, rather how she treats other people. With love and kindness have I drawn thee. I pray I have been some help to you and I pray God moves on her behalf! God bless you, and keep you is my prayer!
I'm so glad that read this because it has really touched my spirit


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