Can You Give 10 Points On How To Keep A Marriage Alive?

[Rabbis Aviyah Byers]

Rabbi and I have been married for 30 years. Can you think of 10 points on how to keep your marriage alive? If you can't would you like to know?

[AliYah]

Here is a set of Key points that was shared by one of the Emah's within our network...

1. There's a time to speak and a time to keep quiet - be trained by haRuach to know the difference.
2. Having said that, always keep the lines of communication open.
3. Develop purity within yourself, and as you develop and maintain pure habits it will flow into your marriage. Only the pure will see Elohim.
4. Be a woman of strength, proper decorum, and maturity. A man needs a woman, not a bratty child as a spouse.
5. Practice praising your husband.
6. Unless you're niddah, are fasting and praying, engage in sexual intercourse regularly. Giving yourself to your husband in this way establishes and strengthens your covenant, settles the nerves, opens his heart and ears to you.
7. We've all read the books on maintaining a well-groomed appearance. It's vital. You don't have to don Stilletos, or look like a diva to look nice. You don't even have to wear makeup. But make sure you're clean, clothing is in good condition, colors and styles that compliment you, hair/head covering (if you wear one) nicely placed/wrapped on your head, clean. And even for those who wear the covering, make sure what's under it is clean and "done". Too often we covered women get lazy, and let our hair go.
8. This goes for our health as well. Stay tight where your health is concerned. No one diet fits all. Find your NT (Nutritional Type), and eat what is appropriate for your genetic coding - good health is nothing to take lightly. Also regular exercise - again - what works for you, just do it religously. You'll look good, feel good, your confidence will increase. Your good health is a gift to your husband.
9. Don't speak lashon hara (evil tongue/gossip) about him, or to him. Discussing someone is one thing, tearing down their character is something completely different - what's the true motive? When you engage in this type of behavior toward him, he may or may not tell you, but it brings you down before his eyes. This is also true when you speak about him. Words are life, sisters, and whether or not gossip ever reaches the ears of your murderee (gossip is character assassination), people can tell when you've shed the blood of another - it shows on the countenance. So, learn the law of the Ayshet Chayil - practice the law of kindness. When you discuss a situation regarding another, pray first, and don't reveal the secrets of your heart with just anyone, only with those who know how to hear, and will pray about the situation, and still love the one you're discussing.
10. Be an Anna. As Anna stayed in the Temple and prayed forth the Messiah, so must we be women of prayer, women of intercession. Pray that the Father will give you the heart of the intercessor, and watch how His will begins to play out in the lives that you're praying for.
~Contributed by Emah Nava~