People who over use the tambourine. If you know you have a problem keeping up
with the beat, please do the church a favor, and pass the tambourine to someone
else! You are truly aggravating so KNOCK IT OFF! Be still and just sing.

People who fake the Spirit. Just because your friend felt His "touch"
and was moved to run around the church, doesn't mean you need to. If you
require several rounds of oxygen and some gator-aide after your 'performance'
chances are you didn't get touched after all. SIT DOWN.

People who constantly holler something to the pastor all during the message. We
don't need you commenting after every sentence pastor says, everybody knows you
know the bible stop showing off! The preacher is 'preaching' directly to you
anyway, but maybe if you be quiet, the whole church wouldn't know he's talking
to you. SHUT UP so everybody else can hear what the pastor has to say to you.

People who constantly go to the bathroom. Nobody uses the bathroom four times
during service and if you actually need to, I suggest wearing Depends, or
sitting at the end of the aisle. People are tired of you knocking off their
hats and wigs as you go by.

People who can't or won't control their kids. Okay, this is a tough one....If
you know lil' Ron Ron 'bout to tear up children's church, don't subject that
poor innocent teacher to your demon-child. Sit lil' Ron Ron next to you, open
your purse and show him your 'gun'....then whisper in his ear and tell him he's
going to see God before his time if he doesn't keep some 'act right'. Then pray
and ask God's forgiveness. How in the world can we concentrate on hearing the
Word, when your child is running up and down the aisle . The Bible says, "spare
the rod, spoil the child," You need to HANDLE UP!!

People who take 'Come AS YOU ARE' to a whole new level. I can understand if you
going through something. But if you got a fresh pair of Jordan 's on and a
T-shirt, then you can certainly invest in some dress clothes and take your
earrings and nose rings out. Since when is it OK for men to wear hats in the
church and wear their pants to their ankles? GET IT TOGETHER!

People who bring food to church. If you brought your baby a little snack, but you're
eating all his cookies and crackers dropping crumbs everywhere that's a
problem. Take those Cheezits, Oreos and little Rae-kwon outside. This is GOD'S

People who come to special church functions and
criticize. If you're standing in a corner gossiping about how you could've done
a better job at something and you haven't volunteered to help with anything and
haven't showed up to any invitations to join a ministry, I'm going to have to
ask you to SHUT-UP!

People who obviously
show they don't like you.
If you don't care for a person for whatever
at least put up a decent front and ACT like you
have some Christian love! When you come to church, you should look past
people's shortcomings. Don't cut somebody up with your evil faces and smart
remarks. Those same faults you see in others, may be found in you!

Finally, parents who dress better than their kids. If you come in looking like
an EBony Fashion model and little Sha-nay-nay is behind you looking like a
poster child for 'Feed the Children,' you are DEAD.

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Comment by Evelyn Blacksher on February 9, 2010 at 2:03pm
rotflol !!

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