Do we as women know what our role is as a Godly woman (wife)? And are we treating our men as men? Most of us have read Proverbs 31:10-31, which speaks of a virtuous woman (wife). But how many of us are truly living up to what God expects of us.
Do we as women know what our role is as a Godly woman (wife)?
When the Bible speaks of a virtuous woman, it means a woman of excellence, moral worth, ability and nobility not just martial fidelity (loyalty; devotion to duty or obligation, reproduction, etc.). Proverbs 31:12 says, “She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.” This is extremely important if you want all that God has promised you. Yes, sometimes our mates drive us up the wall and we want to do something bad to them. But in doing that we are going against everything Proverbs 31:12 says. It is time for us to start taking God’s Word to heart and applying it to our live everyday. Do as Matthew 5:44 says, “Do good to them….”
Diving farther into Proverbs, chapter 14 verse 1 it says, “The wise woman builds her house, but the foolish pulls it down with her hands.” Building our house means developing a peaceful environment for our family. How many time have we been a foolish woman; raising more hell in the house then outside the house. A man goes to work day after day, week after week, year after year, dealing with all kinds of hell in the work place. The last place he needs hell is at home. Home is a place where our mates can escape from the stress and struggles of the day. Home is suppose to be a safe haven for our husbands. Instead home for our husbands is just like the outside, strenuous. This is not what God instructed us to do.
Proverbs 12:4 says, “An excellent wife is a crown to her husband, but she who causes shame to her husband is like rottenness in his bones.” What does excellent mean? It means noble. An excellent wife brings honor to her husband. The Bible says shame is like rottenness in his bones. When something is rotten, it is cancerous, decaying, terrible, bad, in a nut shell not good. Something that causes the bone to decay means it weakens the bone. Take for example the disease osteoporosis. This disease specifically attacks the bone. It wears the bone until it is weak and brittle. Once this happens any little injury can cause major devastation. How does this relate to Proverbs12:4? Very simply we can make our husbands weak. God created woman to be a help. If we are bringing shame to our husbands, we certainly are not helping.
Proverbs 22:1 says, “ A good name is to be chosen rather than great riches loving favor rather than silver and gold.” A good name cannot be replaced so easily, not even with lots of money. A reputation has more value than possessions or wealth. So if we are out there acting unseemly, we are bringing shame to our husbands. And why that action we are causing his (husband) name and report to be bad. We are a reflection of our husbands. If he is seen in a bad way, nine times out of ten, we will be seen in the same light because we are no longer two but one. Remember when we join together in the bonds of holy matrimony we are no longer two we become one (Genesis 2:24).
Proverbs 31:13-15 speaks of a woman’s willingness to work. She seeks wool and flax… She is like the merchant ship, she brings food… She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her husband…
In today’s microwave society, how many of us truly take care of our homes according to what God says. Do not think I am here to demean you. God wants us to wake up and take notice. Have you ever wondered why your house is in an uproar? It could possibly be because we are not obeying God’s command. When we take care of our homes, it must not be done out of obligation or to impress our husbands (although I am sure most of them would think they had something to do with it). We are doing so because we enjoy what we do and because it gives us a sense of pride and fulfillment; not to mention we are obeying God’s Word.
Now you may say to yourself, I am a good woman. There is nothing wrong with that. However there is a difference between a good woman and a Godly woman. A good woman will only go so far for her husband. A Godly woman will go above and beyond. A good woman will seek to please her husband only. A Godly woman puts God first in all things. And by pleasing God she in turn will please her husband.
Are we treating our men as men?
So many women are independent in today’s society. Nothing wrong with that. However, they want to assume the role of a man. Is that what God wants? Are we treating our men like men?
In the previous discussion, we addressed how men should treat a lady and what their role is. Where the problem lies is in how we treat our men (husbands). Many of us want to walk all over our men and talk to them in any kind of way. That, however is not how God intended it to be. In the beginning, God created man and placed him in charge of the Garden of Eden and all its inhabitants (Genesis 1: 26 & 27). God saw where man needed a companion, a helper (Genesis 2:18). So God caused man (Adam) to fall into a deep sleep. From the rib of man, He formed woman(Eve) (Genesis 2:21-23). God established the Divine order from the beginning.
Divine Order Before the Fall of Man
1. God (Jesus)
Divine Order After the Fall of Man
1. God (Jesus) - Exodus 20:1-3
2. Man - Ephesians 5:23
3. Woman - Genesis 3:16b
Remember, in the beginning, we were created equal. Is was not until the fall of man in the Garden of Eden did we lose our equality. Ephesians 5:22 & 23 says, “Wives submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church.” Now what comes next may sound a little confusing. But just keep walking with us. God is going to give us understanding.
Just as Christ is not inferior to the Father but is the second person in the Trinity, so wives are equal to their own husbands. Hold up, how can we be equal if we lost our status after the fall in the Garden of Eden? Here’s how. In a marriage, a husband and wife have different roles. A wife voluntary submission arises out of her own submission to Christ. Notice the word voluntary. When we chose to become the wife of a man, we are deciding voluntarily to submit to our husband. Meaning we now are choosing to step back. Now this is no way means we are a door mat to be walked up on. We still are to be treated with the up most respect. However, because we have decided to submit, our attitudes towards our husbands but change. We must treat men as men; (1) Treat our men with respect (2) Honor our men (3) Encourage our men not degrade him or tear him down (4) Help our men (5) Allow our men to take their rightful place as the head of the house as God commands. In doing this, we are obeying God’s Word.
If we follow the instructions left for us in the Bible, ladies will be treated as ladies and men will be treated as men. Then the blessings of God will pour out more. We think we have seen it all. But eyes hath not seen nor ears heard all that God has in store for those who obey His commands. The best is yet to come.