A man chooses for himself a wife. A wife that he desires. A wife that will love him unconditionally. How do you know you found her? Let unconditional love reign. For if she really loves you that way, you have found her. No one can replace unconditional love, and the other qualities that you want concerning her can be developed, and will follow her.
I partly agree with you brother, but do we take God totally out of the decision process? Does He not have a say in who we choose, being as she was fashined and taken from our rib? Even though we are not "Adam" we are still under the same guidelines and format. When God sets a precedent, He is the only one to change it... As far as the love part though I am with you. Let the love of Christ reign through in the relationship.