Infidelity & Cheating in a marriage...If a child is born as a result, should the spouse except the child?
If a child is born as a result of infidelity and cheating in a marriage should the spouse accept the child? More and more this is a topic amongst believers and non-believers. It is very touchy because many feel that the child being innocent in all of this deserves to have both mom and dad. What say ye?
For the sake of discussion and because this is the most common scenario, we will use the husband. Please understand what you are asking to suggest that a wife accepts her husbands child born out of infidelity. I do know of case where the wife did accept this and the husband ultimately ended up leaving her for the woman whose child he fathered.
In saying that, is it wrong if a wife decides to play the role of Sarah and demand that her husband send the woman and her child packing with no further contact.
Genesis 21:10
Wherefore she said unto Abraham, Cast out this bondwoman and her son: for the son of this bondwoman shall not be heir with my son, even with Isaac.
For the sake of discussion and because this is the most common scenario, we will use the husband. Please understand what you are asking to suggest that a wife accepts her husbands child born out of infidelity. I do know of case where the wife did accept this and the husband ultimately ended up leaving her for the woman whose child he fathered.
In saying that, is it wrong if a wife decides to play the role of Sarah and demand that her husband send the woman and her child packing with no further contact.
Genesis 21:10
Wherefore she said unto Abraham, Cast out this bondwoman and her son: for the son of this bondwoman shall not be heir with my son, even with Isaac.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Evangelist Altha Fugett on
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Ephesians 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
wrath can be produce through non acceptance, it would be better that these men be obedient to God in the matter, so as not to have the blood of their child on their hands
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Permalink Reply by Child of the Kingdom on
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Fugett, do you honestly think that this scripture was talking about bastard children? Yet and still, I think God honors the Wife before the Mistress and her child. Would you want your husband to continue a relationship with a baby mama who he's fathered a child with during your marriage?
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EW, the scripture states that fathers provoke not their children I believe that means his children
What type of relationship do you envision? I would be very disappointed in my husband if had an affair of this sort, but I would be just as disappointed in him being a man of God, that could turn his back on his child, I have two step daughters and I am very adamant that they be a part of my family, one of their mothers I can talk to, one I can't and I pray for her. They are older than my child, and don't fit this situation, but if it happen and I forgave him, I would have to pray for strength to deal with what God allowed
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I am not talking about step children born before your marriage. I am referring to a ripe young thang who wants to use the child to keep her man. That's how they see it, as their man.
Of course a man can take care of his bastard child without his presence required.
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Another reason I started this blog was because I met a sister a while back here on BPN and she and I started talking about this very subject. We exchanged numbers and talked about this issue in detail over the phone. She currently has a few friends who are going through this and she has been trying to give them sound advice.
It's easy for people to say just get a divorce, but that can be very costly. And also keep in mind that when a wife has children and bills of her own they tend to fall on hard times after a divorce. Why should a wife sacrifice for the comfort of the other woman and her child. When scriptures were written regarding children and parents it was in relation to marriage. God has not commanded that a wife excepts a bastard child. Now the husband may have a financial obligation but if his presence in the child's life will interfere with his marriage and his other children then the obvious choice is to not deal with the other child.
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Permalink Reply by Evangelist Lisa Kyles on
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Praise the Lord Saints...
hmmmmmmmm Very awesome Question and i read everyone reply.... this is just my opinion....
The child wasn't asked to be here... it's not the child fault at all.....even though this child was conceived in sin... this child is still innocent. (hope ya'll understand what I'm saying)
But the sin I just won't tollerated it....infideltiy and cheating that is what i won't accept.... then another thought came to me I timothy 5:22 Lay hands suddenly on no man, neither be partaker of other men's sins: keep thyself pure..
don't be partaker of another man sins... would this be the CASE??? accepting the child anyway...hmmmmm just thoughts running through my mind!!!
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Are you asking if staying in the marriage would be partaking in another's sin or if dealing with the child would be partaking in the sin?
I do realize that the child is innocent in all of this but should a wife and her children suffer for the sake of the mistress and her child.
Keeping in mind that most OTHER WOMEN don't just want the father to deal with just the child, they want to remain in the equation. In cases like this who is more important, wife and family or mistress & child?
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Keeping in mind that most OTHER WOMEN don't just want the father to deal with just the child, they want to remain in the equation. In cases like this who is more important, wife and family or mistress & child?
EW, I don't agree with this, if a MAN states I am going to be with my wife, most just want their child support and some free time from the child.
Most women are not to be disrepected, it's these wives that allow it to continue that keep the other woman in the equation
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That may be the case in Texas but I don't know one wife who wants the other woman in the equation. Most wives want them gone and forgotten. What kind of place is Texas anyway?...LOL
I don't know about you but I know some trouble making women. I'm from Detroit and I have seen all kinds of messy relationships. Mistresses confront wives as if they think the wife should step back.
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quote"Are you asking if staying in the marriage would be partaking in another's sin or if dealing with the child would be partaking in the sin?
That's the question I'm askiing .....if dealing with child
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Well that I am not sure of. I can only give real examples of where that has lead. In most cases, dealing with the child means dealing with the mother also. The main reason is, some mistresses use the child as a weapon to destroy the marriage either financially or emotionally.
Most will continue to try and light his fire if you know what I mean, if she is still allowed in the equation. In that regard, it would be partaking in another's sin. However, if the woman realizes that she was wrong in becoming number 3 in the marriage, and will adhere to the wishes of the HUSBAND AND WIFE then it is possible to have a healthy relationship.
BUT BACK TO REALITY. THAT RARELY HAPPENS. MOST WOMEN TODAY ARE LOOKING TO BREAK UP RELATIONSHIPS. This is evident by all of the divorce that is sweeping the nation.
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We say we are saved, not just in the good times but in all times, what example would we be to a little child. If they heard us referring to them as bastards, and keeping them away from their fathers
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